Bon-jour-no

2009 Marlon Welles Awards Nominee:

Best Picture
Best Director
Best Actress: Melanie Laurent's vengeful Shoshana
Best Supporting Actor: Christophe Waltz's gleeful Hans Landa
Best Original Screenplay
The Real Deal
Best Line: "Say auf wiedersehen to your Nazi balls!"
Best Comedic Performance: Aldo Raine.
Best Scene Stealer: Til Schweiger as the sociopath Hugo Stiglitz
Most Surprising Moment: the flashback on Stiglitz's path to becoming a basterd
Best Trailer
Best "Best Moment of the Film": Hans Landa's introduction to the three Italians

Fuck You, You Whore

2009 Marlon Welles Awards Nominee:

Best Picture
Best Actor: Joseph Gordon-Levitt's soul crushing performance
Best Original Screenplay: Scott Neustadter and Michael H. Weber
The Real Deal
Best Line: "This belief stemmed from early exposure to sad British pop music and a total mis-reading of the movie 'The Graduate'. "
Best Montage: Tom gets his life together set to Wolfmother's "Vagabond"
Most Ridiculous Moment: Han Solo winks
Most Innovative Moment: Tie: Putting Tom inside the movies he's watching AND Split screen of Tom's expectations and reality
Best Opening Credits: Baby pictures set to Regina's "Us"
Best Music
Best Use of a Song: Making "You Make My Dreams" relevant again
Best Trailer
Best Use of a Song in the Trailer: Tie: Regina's "Us" AND Wolfmother's "Vagabond"
Best "Best Moment of the Film": Tom and Summer's joy ride through IKEA set to "There Goes the Fear" from the Doves

The Courage of Your Convictions

Julie and Julia

I hate people that pigeonhole a movie into a certain audience. I think there have many such complaints with the release of Julie and Julia recently because people realized that it was actually, you know- a good movie. I went into the theater alone, probably the youngest male inside (mildly surprised at how many people had come to a 4:05 Monday showing) and hightailed it for one of the back rows so nobody could see how embarrassing it was for a teenage male to be sitting alone in a movie classified by mainstream audiences as a "chick flick." True this sort of pigeonholing would ordinarily deter me from seeing such a movie but, damn it, Meryl Streep rocks! And the trailer actually had me excited for the film so fuck it all!

And I liked it (of course). Nora Ephron managed to hold my attention through You've Got Mail so no surprises considering the movie was actually supposed to be good. Meryl Streep is obviously wonderful but I was much more interested in the storyline of Amy Adams' Julie. I know Streep is more entertaining but her storyline lacks a hook for me to grab on. I understand that the drama with her stems from her seemingly futile attempts to get her cookbook published. However, we know that she eventually will since Julie Powell is reading from it in the future. Julie, on the other hand, is stuck in her dead end job, with shallow dead beat friends and finds solace in cooking but also the people that support her blog.

I was very interested in the argument that Julie and her husband have about halfway through the film. She has become completely immersed in her blog and in the emotions of hundreds of people she has never met. Amy Adams plays this moment off subtly but her final admission that she cannot be as good a person as Julia Child is quite riveting and makes you feel rather sympathetic to a character that doesn't charm quite as much as the icon she looks up to. And Chris Messima is supportive and subtle in his best Paul Rudd impersonation. I understand that Streep is remarkable in her role but, from what I have read in reviews, people insist that a movie just about her would have been better. Honestly, two hours of just Julia Child (especially when there doesn't seem to be any real drama with her) would make me go crazy. Her discovery and journey of cooking just isn't as interesting to me as the one Julie Powell takes. Maybe the performances are vastly different in quality but from a plot standpoint, I wanted Julie to succeed and cheered for her when she realized the only Julia Child she needs to worry about is the one in her head.

Grade: B

2009 Marlon Welles Awards Nominee:

Best Actress: Amy Adam's subtly
Best Supporting Actress: Meryl Streep's effusiveness
Best Adapted Screenplay: Nora Ephron and her seemlessly fractured narrative
Best Scene Stealer: Jane Lynch, who I'm convinced should play Big Bird in a biopic

One African Baby and an Ipod

Bruno

What a vexing film. At times outrageously hilarious, other times incessantly grotesque, it is maybe the most hit or miss movie this year. The trailer for Bruno blinded me so much with its hilarity that I forgot about the fact that I didn't like Borat as much as everyone else in the world did. In fact, I much prefer the shortened and varied sketches of Da Ali G show because it seems to restrain Sacha Baron Cohen's insistence on grossing the audience out. This was one of the most anticipated movies for me this summer based solely on that trailer. And it kind of disappointed me. When it made social statements about parental exploitation, gay bashing and the ridiculous talk show phenomenon, Bruno is hilarious and (almost) thought-provoking. However, scenes like the sex party, the tv show panel and the entire final sequence which looked and was pretty much staged by the producers are purely for shock value and do nothing for the progression of the film or social issues.

I found, at times, that the movie was a labor for me. I was waiting for the next scene to happen. I walked out and couldn't believe that it was less than an hour and a half. If Sacha Baron had just stuck to those good scenes, he could have made a good movie. I know for a fact that he had hours of footage to deal with but instead chose to show random people having sex on camera. I really have no complaints about the gay sex scene or the twirling penis on screen. This I think is somewhat necessary shock value. Yes, he's gay. He's not going to be as funny and oblivious as Borat. Bruno knows pretty much what he's doing and loves it. If only the rest of us could.

Grade: B-

2009 Marlon Welles Awards Nominee:

Best Line: "That is such a Samantha thing to say"
Best Comedic Performance: Sacha Baron is still remarkable though
Most Surprising Moment: Penis. On camera.
Best Trailer
Best Use of a Song in the Trailer: "The Barber of Seville"
Best "Best Moment of the Film": The shameless parenting exhibited by the audition parents

Whatever is Written

Whatever Works

I feel like making a lot of puns about how thinly drawn this script is SO, this movie is as thin as:
-Evan Rachel Wood
-Woody Allen's stack of truly crappy movies
-Whatever is left of Larry David's hair
-The window that Boris jumps through
-Boris' willingness to live
-My patience for this movie's credibility

Ok. So this really was not as bad as it could have been. It's a very hit or miss movie. Some of the jokes had me laughing uproariously while others were really stupid. Larry David's asides to the camera were dreadful because it seemed like he was trying to make up for how silly the movie is with his go to line about whatever works (which is a myth, by the way). Be serious. There is no way you can make any overarching statement or theme about this film. It's basically around for cheap laughs.

And that's completely understandable. This was a 30-year-old script that Woody pulled out to beat the writer's strike deadline. I don't think he ever expected this film to be good so he doesn't try too hard to impress us in the movie. It's essentially a fable that takes things a bit too far. The second Patricia Clarkson shows up on screen, caution is thrown to the wind and everything starts falling apart for the movie. Threesomes. Predictable gay bar scenes. Lame attempts at a happy ending. Stupid romances between young people. In fact, when it was just Boris and Melodie married and exploring each other's psyches, I rather liked the movie. Introducing Patricia Clarkson basically transforms the movie from an exploration of marriage and love to a movie about New York's effect on outsiders (which is highly inaccurate I assume). Larry David generally endears himself to me and almost seems relatable until his marriage to Melodie. Evan Rachel Wood's accent didn't annoy me as much as I thought it would. Overall, if you cut out half the movie and change the direction that the couple goes in, I wouldn't have minded the movie.

Grade: C

2009 Marlon Welles Awards Nominee:

Best Comedic Performance: Larry David's misanthrope
Most Ridiculous Moment: So the dad is gay?

Public Frenemies

I found this film fascinating and boring. Riveting and droll. So much of it was contradictory that I could never really get into it. It's a shame that my experience was immediately ruined by the HD look of the film, but it was. I'm used to my gangster movies glamorizing the titular character and portraying him exactly how the audience is supposed to feel about him. Of course, movies today are much more complicated than the rise and fall of Edward G. Robinson in Little Caesar but the look of the film attempted to make it feel contemporary as if these people could be living among us. Michael Mann makes a bold choice here but not one I would make. If you are going to make a movie about the C.I.A. versus the gangsters of yesteryear, make it the ultimate gangster movie about these "enemies." Have the ultimate Heat-like cat and mouse game that you are so well known for. Instead, we get only one real showdown between Bale and Depp (though riveting it may be). The rest of the time we attempt to get insight into the minds of both Purvis and Dillinger as well as the relationship of Dillinger and Billie and come up empty handed.

The beginning especially bored me. After being thrown off by the image I found the first couple of bank robberies underwhelming. Perhaps the lack of suspense in these banks was meant to show how easy it was to be a bank robber back then. Either way, there was no thrill to watching these men rob these banks and then supposedly act like heroes for the rest of the country. Depp is customarily smug in his role and is never asked to stray too far away from what he knows. And I'm glad Bale didn't feel the need to overdo it in a movie that requires little of him as well. No matter what he does, I will always be a Christian Bale fan. Billy Crudup is hilarious as J. Edgar and provided some lift to the movie upon his appearance.

The movie finally shifts into gear towards the middle at which point I realize that I only care for the action sequences in the film. If this is the fault of it being a gangster movie or the fault of the film itself I don't know. The shootout in the forest was awesome as was the climactic moment when Dillinger gets shot. My main fault with the film is the relationship between Dillinger and Billie, which the movie kind of hinged upon. Depp and Cotillard (when I could understand her) had no chemistry and then their relationship is so thinly drawn that when dude goes to visit her in prison after Dillinger dies I contemplated walking out because I didn't care. Everything about this film pushes me away at an emotional level and then tries to pull me back in with the way it looks and is shot. Another contradiction.

Grade: C+

2009 Marlon Welles Awards Nominee:

Best "Best Moment of the Film": Dillinger takes a stroll through the office assigned to him

August

I've always wondered how many movies I watch in a month. Here we go:

August 1
The Last Days
The Wrong Man

August 2
Lolita
Heaven Can Wait

August 3
The Band's Visit
Foreign Correspondent

August 4
Mutiny on the Bounty
The President's Analyst

August 5
(500) Days of Summer
Man Push Cart

August 6
Humpday

August 7
Chop Shop
The Undercover Man

August 8
G.I. Joe

August 9
To Catch a Thief
Office Space

August 10
Julie & Julia

August 11
Goodbye, Solo
The Unforgiven

August 12
None

August 13
The Station Agent
The Bad and the Beautiful
Macao

August 14
District 9
Lilies of the Field

August 15
Helter Skelter
A Raisin in the Sun

August 16
Now, Voyager

August 17
McCabe and Mrs. Miller

August 18
Red Dust
The Gold Rush

August 19
Jackie Brown
In the Loop

August 20
The Heiress

August 21
Inglourious Basterds
All About Eve

August 22
None

August 23
Batman

August 24
Batman Returns

August 25
None

August 26
None

August 27
The Big Knife
While the City Sleeps

August 28
None

August 29
None

August 30
There's Something About Mary

August 31
Kill Bill Vol. 1

Movies to Date: 41

Dug

"Squirrel!"

A Couple of Quirky Coms

I love both of these movies. Call me a sucker for the quirky comedy but I simply cannot resist. Call them pretentious, unrealistic, and silly but I'm always enamored with these types of movies. The Brothers Bloom and Away We Go are no exceptions.

The Brothers Bloom starts out like a Wes Anderson flick and then morphs into something much much more. Adrian Brody and Mark Ruffalo are both well suited for the snappy dialogue required by Rian Johnson. And Rachel Weisz turns in probably my favorite performance of hers. Parts of the movie were cheesy as it seems Johnson is trying to almost be more conventional but there were so many memorable parts: Penelope trying to steal the artifact, Bang Bang's karaoke, Bloom's attempts to get to know Penelope, etc.

I think something major missing from Johnson's previous work, Brick, was a cinematic touch. Too often it looked like a jumbled mess. His second feature is much more layered and regal. The cast as previously mentioned is top notch and he manages to separate himself from the Wes Anderson niche by actually having an interesting plot. Like Duplicity before it, this film takes many twists and turns and sometimes overstays its welcome (I really thought it could have ended when Penelope uncovers the initial plot) but never ceases to entertain. On a side note, seeing Adrian Brody attempt to be happy when Bloom starts to enjoy life freaked me out. He needs to always have that scared, nervous look on his face.

Grade: A-

2009 Marlon Welles Awards Nominee:

Best Picture
The Real Deal
Best Comedic Performance: Rachel Weisz's blissful Penelope
Best Scene Stealer: Rinko's mysterious Bang Bang
Best Music
Best Line: "I think you're constipated...in your fucking soul!" and "Oh fuck"
Best "Best Moment of the Film": Penelope's description of her hobbies

Away We Go, on the other hand, attempts to basically do an adult Juno. A woman becomes pregnant and tries to figure out a sense of who she is and what she should be doing with her life. Constantly trying to be a balancing act between absurdity and stark realism, this is probably Sam Mendes' best since American Beauty. As Jim Halpert(he will never be different to me) and Maya Rudolph travel around trying to find where their home is and whether they really are "fuck-ups," I became genuinely concerned and invested in where they would end up.

Essentially, the movie is a series of vignettes with a title card before each new location indicating what stage of their travels the couple is on. I take issue with people calling the movie pretentious. Basically, what critics take from the movie is that the couple only learns that they are better than everyone else. This couldn't be farther from the truth. Both Jim and Maya have their own separate quirks that endear them to the audience but also make the audience wonder whether this couple really should be in charge of a child. Sure every new person they meet is a complete caricature and is meant to show the audience that the couple is better off than them but the caricatures mean so much more to the couple. They represent the continuing journey home that the couple is trying to find. It's not so much that the couple is better than every family they meet, but rather that they wouldn't fit in to the environment that their friends are a part of.

Overall, Away We Go is anchored by strong performances by Jim Hapert and Maya Rudolph and make the caricatures seem almost plausible. Reminiscent of a good Woody Allen comedy, the film juxtaposes comedy with drama and asks serious questions about true love, one's true home and true hilarity.

Grade: B+

2009 Marlon Welles Awards Nominee:

Best Picture
The Real Deal
Best Actor: Jim Halpert
Best Actress: Maya Rudolph
Best Original Screenplay: Dave Eggers and Vendela Vida
Best Music
Best "Best Moment of the Film": The emotional climax on the trampoline

The Hangover

I've seen The Hangover twice now. The first one doesn't count since it was with a free preview audience. They automatically suck. They're so excited to be at a free preview of a movie that they'll laugh at anything. Upon second screening with an actual paying crowd, I found that this movie is pretty hit or miss. As far as performances go, I don't think there will be a funnier performance this year than Zach Galifianakis shows in this film. Ed Helms has shown me he can get out of his Office bubble while Bradley Cooper firmly establishes himself as a comedic force to be reckoned with in the future. I don't think an asshole has ever been so likable as him.

In terms of plot, it seems like an uproarious idea. Trying to remember and piece together the events of the previous night. However, I'd rather the film also shown what the guys did to make their apartment so messy. Sure the ending credits were clever in showing the events through pictures. However, we never get a firm sense of what a good time they had throughout the night. And after all, isn't the movie an excuse to show a giant party. Also, the reason for Doug's absence fell flat with me. By having him be on the roof the entire time, you basically make their entire recollection null and void. If Doug was in the room when they woke up, the movie would never have a purpose. I would have even been fine with Doug being kidnapped by the mob. Instead, we allow Ed Helms to pick up on a stupid line like "You're more likely to end up on the roof than the floor." That didn't make sense.

Overall though, the hype for the movie is pretty well deserved. In an age where raunch is being tried by pretty much every comedy, The Hangover succeeds by combining strong performances with some sufficiently ridiculous events like stealing Mike Tyson's tiger. The music is consistently interwoven throughout the movie (sometimes incessantly) and works well in transitioning from essentially one comedic sketch to another. I kind of wish Ken Jeong wasn't given such major moments to perform because he's best in subtle moments where he steals the spotlight from someone else. The Hangover is pretty funny but to be honest, I don't want to see a sequel.

Grade: B

2009 Marlon Welles Awards Nominee:

Best Comedic Performance: Zach Galifianakis
Best Montage: Rain Man sequence in the casino
Best Scene Stealer: Ken Jeong
Most Surprising Moment: Was that really Galifianakis in all his glory?
Best Music
Best Use of a Song: Making Phil Collin's "In the Air Tonight" relevant again
Best Trailer
Best Use of a Song in the Trailer: Rihanna's "Live Your Life"
Best "Best Moment of the Film": The kid in the police station getting back at Alan with tazer theatrics

When I Grow Up I Wanna Be Famous

Two movies. Both sports themed. Both sports posing as metaphors for fame and fortune. Two very different interpretations of athletes. And I loved both of them for very different reasons.

Rudo y Cursi has been on my radar since Sundance and with the Three Amigos as producers and the writer of y tu mama tambien in tow, I was expecting some kind of human drama with a soccer background. Instead, Carlos Cuaron has delivered an immensely fun and light fable of two brothers who both make it to the top of Mexican soccer and end up in a do or die game at the end of the movie. This movie does not take itself seriously and I love it for it. Luna and Bernal exude an excellent energy and chemistry together as usual and convey the right amount of wacky and fun that is needed for a fun movie like this. Sure the metaphor of soccer and rivalry and pleasing one's mother is completely bogus, but it still resonates despite the ridicule. A typical rise and fall with a brotherly twist, Rudo and Cursi both entertain and, ultimately, pay for their idiotic actions in life.

On the complete opposite side of the spectrum, the titular figure of Sugar makes it no where near the top of his sport. Several time during the movie, you expect him to finally pick up his game and make it to the majors. Instead, reality hits. He simply does not have enough talent for the big times. As he watches his aging friend get black balled because of his diminishing skills, the reality sets in that he has to quit the game he used to love in order to think about the future. As an opposition to the other movie in this post, Sugar makes it clear that sport does not make a life but rather distracts one from the reality of it. Filled to the brim with genuine pathos, I left the theater concerned about Sugar's life ahead and the lives of many immigrants struggling in the United States.

Rudo y Cursi: B-

2009 Marlon Welles Awards Nominee:

Most Ridiculous Moment: They shot his leg off!
Best Use of a Song: "I Want You to Want Me" as performed by Gael Garcia Bernal

Sugar: B

Drag Me to Up

I have so much to catch up on. So this is probably the most interesting double feature I have and ever will see in my life. As midnight showings would have it, neither Up nor Drag Me to Hell offered me a chance at sleep deprivation so, instead of choosing one of the two to watch on a
Friday night, we went to both with Sam Raimi's thrill fest up first:

















Drag Me to Hell

I hate horror movies. They are usually stupid, unrealistic and ultimately provide me with zero thrills or entertainment whatsoever. I've become recently a little less stiff towards the prospects of watching a horror movie but the fact that Orphan will probably make a shit ton more money than a wonderfully quirky film like The Brothers Bloom scares me more than than the former probably would if I saw it.

That being said, Drag Me to Hell is maybe the most fun I've had at a movie in a long time. It is utter brilliance. I really mean that. Sam Raimi has once again managed to subvert the genre much better than some silly Wayans could by simply setting out to scare you and then making you laugh at the fact that he scared you. The entire sequence in the parking lot is haunting and yet ridiculous.

I think it's awesome that the plot is so thinly drawn. Woman gets angry, sets curse upon woman who pissed her off, woman tries not to go to hell. Ha! That's so unrealistic that you can only have fun at a movie like this. When I kept recommending it to my friends, they would basically scoff at me because they think it's just another horror movie. They have a point. The trailer is indicative of another Haunting in Connecticut but the movie itself is so much better and essentially a fun ride. It's kind of sad that it takes cinephiles with extensive knowledge of Raimi's previous work to enjoy a movie like this but maybe the future of horror movies can learn something from this movie because it's, in a word, awesome.

Grade: A-

2009 Marlon Welles Awards Nominee:

Best Picture
The Real Deal
Best "Best Moment of the Film": The possessed donkey
Best Scene Stealer: Reggie Lee's caricature of nervous and conniving Stu
Most Surprising Moment: She still ends up being dragged to hell


Up

Wall-E is probably one of the best animated pictures ever and maybe the most daring. To follow that up (pun intended) is no easy task. Overall, I think Pixar has provided another solid entry but one that cannot rival the previously mentioned masterpiece they produced last year.

Up is great. By any standards it's one of the best movies of the year. But, as I already said, it followed an unrelentingly fun film so it was handicapped from the beginning. I'm sure that I'll like it more when I see it again but upon first glimpse, I was not blown away by the film. The montage sequence of Carl Fredrickson and his wife was as touching as everyone had said it would be. The juxtaposition of the two leads was hilarious and was accentuated by the hilarity of the talking dogs.

I think my only problem with the movie is that the villain, Charles Muntz, falls flat for me. He was Fredrickson's idol but now he's trying to prove to the world that the tropical bird is real? I don't know. Overall, it seemed a little forgettable as far as Pixar movies are concerned but then again, I did see after the catharsis of Drag Me to Hell. I don't know. Either way, it will probably still be better than most movies this year.

Grade: B+

2009 Marlon Welles Awards Nominee:

Best Animated Picture
Best Montage: The life and relationship of the Fredricksons
Best Scene Stealer: Dug the dog. "I have just met you and I love you."
Best Use of a Song: The Habanera as Carl is getting out of bed

Summer So Far

X-Men Origins: Wolverine

The formula that I determined from Iron Man for a good superhero movie was a balance of good story with good action sequences. Because after all, the only thing people want from summer movies is mindless entertainment. Wolverine, in this case, succeeds completely in the mindless department. The first thing I thought about when I walked out of the theater was how bad I felt for Gavin Hood. After really touching me with the conventional yet still emotionally resonant Tsotsi, he proceeded to completely ruin his career with his Hollywood fare so far.

This film was poorly written, poorly executed and actually bored me at times. Deadpool was woefully underused as was Sabretooth. Hugh Jackman did his part but when the screenplay is so terrible to begin with, there is no way to recover. That final battle sequence looked contrived and bored me to death. Admittedly, my expectations were terrible which, coupled with my relative indifference for the first three movies, made my experience with this movie all the more miserable. I was pretty much just looking for all of the film's flaws unfortunately. And boy did the film deliver in that department.

Grade: D

2009 Marlon Welles Awards Nominee:

Most Ridiculous Moment: Boy Wolverine's dramatic(?) "NOOOO!"


Star Trek

I mean, there is very little I can say about this movie. It made me a fan of the show. I'm actually planning on revisiting the original tv show just to make the film all the more enjoyable. However, I must admit: I wasn't blown away. I saw it opening night in IMAX and enjoyed myself but thought it was only light fare. Which really confuses me. Have my summer expectations been so hardened by the nihilistic stylings of The Dark Knight? Perhaps. More realistically, I think the lack of eminent danger was the real deal breaker for me. I never really got a sense that the characters were ever in danger. This coupled with the failure of the villain as anything more than an angry, funny running man prevented the film from being truly great for me. However, the film is still good fun and reaffirms my belief that J.J. Abrams can do no wrong.

Grade: B+

2009 Marlon Welles Awards Nominee:

Best Scene Stealer: Simon Pegg's take on Scotty
Best Trailer
Best "Best Moment of the Film": The action sequence with Kirk and Sulu stopping the laser is incredible in IMAX.

Terminator: Salvation

I don't really agree with the critics on this one. I've been trying my best to avoid all critic's opinions of a movie until I see it this summer. When I went to Rotten Tomatoes to check on the score for this film, I was expecting a 60%, maybe 50. However, a 33%? Worse than Angels and Demons? Nay I say.

Sure the script is treacherous at the end. There are many cheesy parts but I think this was loads better than T3 even with the digitally altered Arny making an appearance. To be honest, the week preceding my viewing of this film included seeing T2 and T3 in their entirety for the first time. For the sake of avoiding another entry, Terminator 2 is probably the best action movie I have ever seen. Such depth and dense themes coupled with absolute fantastic action sequences equals brilliance.

Knowing this, Salvation obviously comes short. However, I like the idea of a brand new Terminator franchise. Essentially, the film would do better to avoid the label of Terminator since it is fundamentally a different movie. The weathered and drab look of the film is fantastic as well as the acting. I don't care what people say about Christian Bale, the script didn't ask for a dynamic and marvelous performance so Bale gave what he gives best: intensity. Overall, the ending really sucked but I enjoyed most parts of the film and I look forward to seeing the next film in the franchise. On a side note, movies Salvation reminded me of: the giant machines=War of the Worlds, the tiny arm machines=Transformers, the scene in the white room at Skynet=Mission Impossible.

Grade: B-

2009 Marlon Welles Awards Nominee:

Most Surprising Moment: You're gonna kill John Connor? Oh right.
Most Ridiculous Moment: "Tell them I'll be back."
Best Trailer

Recovery Time

I really needed a break after that Alphabet Film Festival. I managed to spend the entirety of this past week trying to catch up on season finales of my favorite shows. However, now that I have distanced myself from the marathon of movies that I experienced, I can finally share a few highlights:

• I think the movies that will most stay with me are Days of Heaven and sex, lies, and videotape.
• If I were ever to sacrifice my soul to become a film director, my only purpose would be to make good movies that begin with the letters "q" and "x".
• No, really, The Quiet Man sucked.
• Movies on the cusp of greatness: The Adventures of Robin Hood, Full Metal Jacket, His Girl Friday, Malcolm X and y tu mama tambien.
• The drill sergeant from Full Metal Jacket is one of the funniest characters in cinema history.
• Holocaust movies can very easily lose their relevance.
• I really shouldn't have made someone or something eat it for every movie I watched. I quickly ran out of ideas.
• I reluctantly learned to enjoy and appreciate horror movies although I'm still not a horror junkie. Horror movies are still only good when suspense is built from an unknown opponent.
• Crime movies also don't age well. White Heat was good but not great yet it was still more timely than Little Caesar and Key Largo.
• Edward G. Robinson is still the shit though.
• I can't seem to hate movies very easily. That's a good sign, right?

I think by the final stretch, I was really exhausted. In the midst of my Woody Allen marathon now, I'm liking the idea of just enjoying a movie instead of having to watch it. Until the next ridiculous idea of mine!

Observe and Report...

...is a really fuckin' funny film. Alliteration. I saw it over a month ago and still think it's hilarious. I'll actually write about it when I see it again. It's already been pulled from local theaters because of how many people didn't like it. I'm not one of those.

Hot off the Presses!

I'll just go ahead and group these two movies. After all, the closing credits of State of Play shows the making of newspapers that is continued in the opening credits of The Soloist. They had it coming!

A few thoughts on each. I found both to be excellent examples of the power that newspapers can yield at one time or another. This is especially relevant since this very same business is being threatened at the moment. This threat seems to be alluded to by Russell Crowe when he initially dismisses Rachel McAdams' blogger (by the way, the name Della Frye? the future name of my first born) as nothing more than a sign of the apocalypse. I like my newspaper men rugged and playing against the rules. There's simply nothing better!

State of Play is driven by an excellent conspiracy theory. Coming from a passionate fan of 24, this film hit right up my alley. Crowe is fantastic and McAdams just keeps giving me more reasons to fall in love with her. I actually thought Helen Mirren was underutilized while Ben Affleck either didn't have the talent for the material or wasn't given good material for his talent. I won't give an opinion on that but simply reitorate my love for him. State of Play manages to be both plot driven and character driven and offers a memorable turn by an almost unrecognizable Jason Bateman. Simply put: a taunt thriller.

Grade: B

2009 Marlon Welles Awards Nominee:

Best Actor: Russell Crowe's ruggedness
Best Adapted Screenplay
Best Scene Stealer: Jason Bateman's exasperated, hilarious club promoter
Best "Best Moment of the Film": The entire sequence in the garage is intense!

The Soloist on the other hand is a much more complex notion. I liked many parts of it while being put off by many parts of it. I think the film works best as a fight between focus and neglect. Much of the film seems to be very intentionally roughly cut. Many scenes are cut at an unexpected point. If this is done intentionally, this is excellently juxtaposed with sequences of complete focus and centeredness. These are the moments where Jaime Foxx is completely centered on the music. I like the notion of letting the audience feel the schizophrenia of Foxx's character by sometimes not explaining what they are seeing. However, the film often becomes a message about homelessness which I felt was incessant. The movie works solely as a character driven exposition of emotion.

Grade: B-

2009 Marlon Welles Awards Nominee:

Best Actor: RDJ's alcoholic reporter. Another fine turn for this come backer.
Best Use of a Song: Beethoven's 9th Symphony
Best Use of a Song in the Trailer: Prelude from Bach's Cello Suite No. 1

Angels and Demons

I read this book last year meaning it was inevitable for me to see this movie. My expectations weren't too high (The Da Vinci code was horribly yawn inducing but in print, Angels and Demons has more potential entertainment value). After walking out of the theater with my friends trashing the movie, I was forced to subdue the shear entertainment that the film produced for me. Yes, Tom Hanks essentially phones in his role but the story is just pure entertainment. I will concede one thing though: in print, many things seem to be much more plausible than when you actually see them on screen. And adapting these books to the screen is a doomed cause from the beginning. There is simply too much prose and mythology that there is no time for on screen. Instead of respecting Robert Langdon and believing in him like I did in the books, I found him to be a pompous ass in the few chances he had to display his intellect in the film. Ron Howard seems to have been solely focused on the action and thrill seeking moments of the book when translating them to the screen. In the end, I'm fine with this. The book does offer many moments of edge of your seat thrills that kept me interested in the movie while my friends trashed it from the beginning and never relented even blaming me for the failure of the film at the end.

Perhaps I'm too invested in the book. When things got slow, I was waiting for the next twist that was about to come. When it comes to it, the books are enjoyable for the thrills as well as mythology that come with it (even if it's fabricated, it still compliments the thrill ride you are taken on). Ultimately, it is a breezy film that only half fails.

Grade: C+

2009 Marlon Welles Awards Nominee:

Most Ridiculous Moment: Really? Parachute away from the antimatter explosion? I knew this was coming and still thought it was ridiculous.

I'm a hungerin...

WOW. There are a million words that could describe this movie and I'm terrible at thinking of one. I'm far behind on writing about recent movies but I just got back from this film (finally reaching the lowly screens of Nashville) and my eyes are still wide open. I have no idea what to do with myself right now. I will never look at food the same way and it will take awhile before I can watch a movie again (ok that's not true). Shit. I can't even function right now. Powerful. Devastating. Disturbing. Heartbreaking. Fucking awesome. That's my general consensus right now. I love when painters make movies. There's always a certain look to them and I'm always astounded by them. (Here's lookin' at you Mr. Schnabel)

I loved the fact that half the movie was silent. In fact, the only real sequence of dialogue is between Bobby and the priest and took far too long. I think I had gotten so used to no dialogue that I was tired of their conversation and just wanted another powerful silent scene. The scene where the SWAT team is brought in to beat the prisoners is one of the best shot, powerful scenes I have ever seen. And the tension that builds with them beating their shields? Crazy good. Man, I want to bottle the feelings I am experiencing right now from this movie and relive it every day. There are very few movies that last with me like this one. I just want to watch it again now. God, I can't even organize my thoughts. Bobby looked like Christian Bale from the Machinist. Creeeeepy. I never get grossed out or shocked from movies and yet again, Hunger surprised me.

His name is Steve McQueen. Steven fucking McQueen! You have earned my eternal gratitude.

Grade: A

Alphabet Film Festival

Keeping track of the movies I see each day with a short blurb of said film and who deserves to eat the proverbial "it".

A is for......The Adventures of Robin Hood
Errol Flynn is a bad ass in a swashbucklingly fun film. (Eat it Ridley Scott)
A-

B is for......Bullitt
A cool little movie ahead of its time. San Francisco rocks. (Eat it Clint Eastwood)
B-

C is for......The Candidate
An amusingly revealing look at just how crappy politics is. (Eat it Chris Rock)
(Note: I still love Head of State though)
B

D is for......Days of Heaven
A wistful, gorgeous, and perfectly crafted tragedy that packs a punch. (Eat it Pearl Harbor (the movie))
A

E is for......Eraserhead
I have no idea. I really don't. I'm going to go clean myself. (Eat it.....me)
C-

F is for......Full Metal Jacket
A cool, hard, often hilarious view of Vietnam. (Eat it Oliver Stone)
A-

G is for......Ghostbusters
Bill Murray steals the show in this fun yet unnecessarily scary comedy. (Eat it CGI)
B+

H is for......His Girl Friday
Epitomizes the screwball comedy with a classic Cary Grant performance. (Eat it Adam's Rib)
A-

*Kramer/Tracy Double*
I is for......Inherit the Wind
Almost comically preachy, Spencer Tracy and Gene Kelly give a humanist touch to a great parable. (Eat it William Jennings Bryan)
B+


J is for......Judgment at Nuremburg
A preachy, lengthy exhibition from a holocaust obsessed Hollywood. (Eat it Stanley Kramer)
C

*Edward G. Robinson Double*
K is for......Key Largo
A breezy crime film with noirish potential falling flat. (Eat it Humphrey Bogart)
B-

L is for......Little Ceasar
A seminal rise and fall film with Eddie G. kicking ass. (Eat it Jimmy Cagney)
B

M is for......Malcolm X
An engrossing, inventive and overall revealing look at a very complex individual. (Eat it biopics)
A-

N is for......Night of the Living Dead
A campy, apocalyptic scrapper with a solemn ending and a plot that actually makes sense. (Eat it Eli Roth/Rob Zombie/Zack Snyder)
B+

O is for......One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest
An interesting and odd take on the freedom and rebellion of mankind. (Eat it the rest of Danny Devito's career)
B+

P is for......The Postman Always Rings Twice
An overly complicated yet trademark noir with impeccable acting and characters. (Eat it Barbara Stanwyk)
B+

Q is for......The Quiet Man
A droll and exhausting yet well shot vehicle that lost my interest quickly. (Eat it John Wayne)
D+

R is for......Red Rock West
A tightly wound noir where I actually liked Nicholas Cage. (Eat it the rest of his movies)
B

S is for......sex, lies, and videotape
A mesmerizing, intimate, and seductive look at communication and honesty with fantastic acting. (Eat it Ocean's movies)
A

T is for......The Thing
A quese inducing, shocking, and ultimately fascinating horror film with an eye towards human
nature. (Eat it [see "N"])
B+

U is for......Unbreakable
Manages to reinforce and reinvent all comic book cliches while still being entertaining. (Eat it M. Night's other movies)
B+

V is for......Vanilla Sky
A flabbergasting and confusing experience. I like that though. (Eat it Tom Cruise)
B-

W is for......White Heat
The great, classic gangster film that I've been waiting for. (Eat it Little Caesar)
B+

X is for......Xanadu
I just want to meet the person that thought this would be a good idea. (Eat it Hollywood)
C-

Y is for......Y tu mama tambien
An infectious and frank film that goes where other coming of age films dare not. (Eat it Vicky Cristina Barcelona)
A-

Z is for.......Zathura
Ultimately far too thinly drawn and predictable, if light. (Eat it Dax Shepard)
D

26 Days Later

Thus begins my own personal film festival. 26 days, 26 movies I haven't seen, 26 letters of the alphabet. I'll be making a list of movies I have free access to that begin with each letter of the alphabet.

Wednesday, May 6---A
The Adventures of Robin Hood
Arsenic and Old Lace
As Good As it Gets
Alice Doesn't Live Here Anymore
The Age of Innocence
After Hours
The Awful Truth
Anchors Aweigh
American Madness

Thursday, May 7---B
Barry Lyndon
Bullitt
Best in Show
Boarding Gate
Batman
Breathless
Boxcar Bertha
Broadway Danny Rose
Boyz N' the Hood
The Band's Visit
Barbarella

Friday, May 8---C
Charade
The Constant Gardner
Clockers
The Counterfeiters
Chop Shop
City Lights
Camille
Cape Fear
The Candidate
Cool Hand Luke
Cabaret

Saturday, May 9---D
The Dirty Dozen
Dog Day Afternoon
Deliverance
Days of Heaven

Sunday, May 10---E
Eraserhead
East of Eden
Enter the Dragon
The Exorcist
Elegy
The Edge of Heaven

Monday, May 11---F
The Front Page
The Fortune Cookie
Five Star Final
Foreign Correspondent
From Dusk Till Dawn
The Fugitive
Farewell, My Lovely
4 Months, 3 Weeks, and 2 Days
Full Metal Jacket

Tuesday, May 12---G
The Greatest Show on Earth
The Great Dictator
The Gold Rush
Grand Hotel
Gilda
The Glenn Miller Story
Giant
Get Carter
Ghostbusters

Wednesday, May 13---H
High Sierra
His Girl Friday
Holiday
Hair
Hello Dolly!

Thursday, May 14---I
Inherit the Wind
In Cold Blood

Friday, May 15---J
Joyeaux Noel
Judgment at Nuremburg

Saturday, May 16---K
Key Largo
King Kong
Kramer vs. Kramer
Klute

Sunday, May 17---L
Little Ceasar
The Life of Emile Zola
Love and Death
Lock, Stock, and Two Barrels
Letters From Iwo Jima
The Last of the Mohicans
Lost Horizon
Love Songs
The Lost Weekend
Lifeboat
The Last Temptation of Christ
Letter From an Unknown Woman

Monday, May 18---M
My Left Foot
A Man for All Seasons
Mrs. Minniver
Mutiny on the Bounty
Mildred Pierce
Modern Times
Manhattan
Malcolm X
Monsoon Wedding
The Music Man
The Motorcycle Diaries

Tuesday, May 19---N
No End in Sight
Night of the Living Dead

Wednesday, May 20---O
Oliver!
On Golden Pond
Only Angels Have Wings
Once Upon a Time in America
The Orphanage
One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest

Thursday, May 21---P
The Public Enemy
Pride of the Yankees
The Postman Always Rings Twice
Passion of the Christ

Friday, May 22---Q
Quills (Hulu)
Quest for Fire (Hulu)
The Quiet Man

Saturday, May 23---R
The Road Warrior
Rebel Without a Cause
Revolver
Reprise
Red Rock West

Sunday, May 24---S
Seven Samurai
She Wore a Yellow Ribbon
Shadow of a Doubt
Sergeant York
Stalag 17
Saboteur
Stardust Memories
sex, lies, and videotape
Strangers on a Train
Superman
The Seven Year Itch
Scarface
Shall We Dance
Swingers
Salo

Monday, May 25---T
They Were Expendable
Torn Curtain
Taxi to the Dark Side
THX: 1138
2 Days in Paris
The Thing
12 Monkeys

Tuesday, May 26---U
Unforgiven
Unbreakable

Wednesday, May 27---V
Very Bad Things (Hulu)
Vanilla Sky

Thursday, May 28---W
Woman of the Year
White Heat
Who's Afraid of Virginia Woolf?
The Wind That Shakes the Barley
The Weather Underground
Water Drops on Burning Rocks

Friday, May 29---X
Xanadu

Saturday, May 30---Y
Young and Innocent
Yeast (Hulu)
Your Friends and Neighbors (Hulu)
Y tu mama tambien

Sunday, May 31---Z
Zathura

A Matter of Taste

I was reflecting on Ben Stiller's career recently and found myself very split about everything that he has offered the masses. I love whenever he tries his hand at being an auteurish writer/director/star evidenced by the fantastic comedy romps Zoolander and last year's Tropic Thunder that blend outrageousness with actual sentimental comedy. And his characters in both are outlandish and hysterical.

In addition to these personal moments, he has also managed to completely steal some movies through his portrayal of some ridiculous characters in which he completely loses himself in the quirks and nuances of some particularly hateful people. In this case, I'm thinking of his roles in Heavyweights, Happy Gilmore, Dodgeball and even The Royal Tenanbaums to a certain extent.

These characters are not what the movies are remembered for but everytime I see them again (on tv of course) I find myself amazed at how he basically set a precedent for the Will Ferrell ignorant archetype that the team of Danny McBride and Jody Hill has perfected in recent times (more on that later). Like take his retirement home wacko in Happy Gilmore. He only apears in a few scenes, but when I was watching it, a mere glipse of the home reminded me of the hilarity which was about to ensue as Ben Stiller was about to intimidate Happy's grandma.

The problem is, these priceless characters are juxtaposed rather negatively with his romantic comedy roles where he always seems to try and act like the down-to-Earth guy that's frustrated with the ridiculous people around him. (Perhaps this rom-com character has become exasperated with the much funnier characters that replace him) In this vein, we're talking Meet the Parents, Duplex, Along Came Polly, The Heatbreak Kid, even Starsky and Hutch (where he's supposed to be outlandish) and my much beloved There's Something About Mary. Whenever I think about his roles in these films, I think of him yelling in that Ben Stiller, frustrated way such as appeared in all the Heartbreak trailers as I remember. I absolutely hate this character even if some of the movies are close to my heart.

The only conclusion I can come up with is that he's doing a Steven Soderbergh type thing where he does mainstream rom-coms in that realistic way making his independent outlandish turns a reality in an unspoken deal with studios. He seems like he enjoys being a Zoolander type more often than not (as evidenced by his Joaquin Phoenix turn at the Oscars this year) but then why does he come back to the rom-com role time and time again. Is this what audiences want to see? For now, I'll place him in the Brad Pitt category of being a character actor stuck in a leading man's body. This would explain the relative unattractness of all of his characters (both physically and mentally). I mean: what's not to love?

The Marlon Welles Awards

Introducing the Marlon Welles Awards, the awards dedicated the whatever the fuck I thought was cool in cinema year to year. Note: technical categories cut in favor of what I just described.

Current categories include (but may be extended upon later):

Best Picture
Best Director
Best Actor
Best Actress
Best Supporting Actor
Best Supporting Actress
Best Original Screenplay
Best Adapted Screenplay
Best Animated Picture

The Real Deal (my top 10)
Best Line
Best Montage
Best Comedic Performance
Best Scene Stealer
Most Surprising Moment
Most Ridiculous Moment
Most Innovative Moment
Best Opening Credits
Best Music
Best Use of a Song
Best Trailer
Best Use of a Song in the Trailer
Best "Best Moment of the Film"


I'll have to update previous posts now. Damn.

Quick Hits

A few movies that I have been catching up on lately.

Synecdoche, New York

I was determined that, after watching this movie, I wouldn't be as befuddled as everyone else seems to be when they see it. And frankly, I failed. It seems that with each of these Charlie Kaufman films I never quite get invested in the story and seem to always think about what possibly could go through Kaufman's mind in envisioning these films. After watching one of the DVD features, Kaufman was described as an auteur and he is one in every sense of the word. While the auteur theory seems to apply to directors more often than not, Kaufman established himself as one through his sheer bizarre writings and now, with this film, established himself from the director's chair.

I kept thinking to myself throughout the film how cool the idea is: to look at oneself truly, one has to build a replica of his life and observe himself. I think the movie is generally about observing oneself from the outside similar to how posthumous narrators in movies like Sunset Blvd. and American Beauty seem to revel in their pathetic existence but I couldn't quite grasp everything that Kaufman was throwing at me. Wikipedia tells me the significance of motifs like the burning house but I don't think my mind can wrap itself around these things (sidenote: I REALLY need to stop consulting wikipedia while I watch movies). There is no denying my respect for the film and for pretty much anything PSH does but I never seem to able to understand Kaufman.

Grade: C+

Kill Me Again

As part of my film noir class, we've finally reached the neo-noir section and I'm loving it. Michael Madsen is the true modern embodiment of the noir actor and Val Kilmer does a quaint job filling in the gumshoe character established by Bogie et al. I think Joanne Whaley is trying to be a femme fatale but tends to fail and just be more of a nuissance and a damsel in distress, even when she shoots Jack Andrews (such a gumshoe name) at the end. I was surprised that I had never hear of this John Dahl fellow beforehand but you can really tell how much he loves film noir and this film only proves how the noir has to be adapted so hard for it to work in modern society. It's not that I didn't like the movie, I just didn't feel the dark tones of a true noir and instead only got the general plotline of one.

Thematically, though, it's a pretty good homage to the themes of the golden age. The desert provides a haunting backdrop for the existentialist, isolationist ideas that makes noir so gritty. By the end of the film, these were relatively thrown out in favor of James Bond action sequences even down to the bad guys driving their car into a gas thing and exploding. (It even had the 80s Timothy Dalton look to it.) I think this is a good debut for John Dahl and I look forward to seeing his other movies like Red Rock West and The Last Seduction which I hear are quite good.

Grade: B

Groundog Day

Words cannot begin to describe how much I loved this movie. Every second I think about it I like it more and more. I think my favorite part about it is the fact that the overall message is nothing that hasn't already been tred upon in films like The Christmas Carol: A Bad man finds himself frozen in time and reflects upon the life he has led. I have found that Harold Ramis can do no wrong (leading to my ever increasing expectations for Year One this Summer) and he shapes this film with as little cynicism as possible (except of course coming from the mouth of the legendary Bill Murray). And that's where this reflection begins and ends: with Bill Murray.

I like to think that the audience's emotional roller coaster follows the same path as Phil Conners as he slowly goes from comedic to tragic to hopeful about his predicament (by the way, I love that we never know why he's repeating the same day; it doesn't matter). Bill Murray manages to make every scene he is in somewhat comedic, dramatic, and tragic all at the same quirky time. I honestly felt invested in his tribulations, something that rarely happens to me, and felt generally ecstatic at the end (although I wish the movie would go on as long as Phil Conners' day). Best line by far: "Don't drive angry. Do not drive angry." I found out that Tom Hanks was wanted by Ramis for the film and Hanks said that the audience couldn't see him as a bad man so it wouldn't work. Murray is the rarest of actors: likeable and unlikeable, funny and sad, great and bad, all at the same time.

Grade: A

Seven Pounds

WHAT? That's all I can really say about this. Will Smith and Rosario Dawson do a good job but this movie was doomed when the writer thought of the idea. All I will write is questions: Why the jellyfish? Couldn't his brother have come earlier? Why is everyone crying the entire time? Barry Pepper? Woody Harrelson? Why is it so obvious that he's going to die from the beginning? Why does the editing suck? Why do Rosario and Woody cry and hug without any other words? WHY DIDN'T ANYONE STOP WILL SMITH FROM DOING THIS? (This refers to both the actor and to his character in the film)

Grade: D